Friday, March 28, 2014

6 Year Anniversary


Can you believe it has been 6 years since our beloved Tonia has gone to her heavenly home? Time
passes so swiftly in some senses and yet can drag slowly on a day to day basis. Just ask Dax how slow the week days of school are compared to the weekends and summer days. Kristi of course feels the exact opposite. There are so many thoughts throughout each year that I wish I had a better recording system in my brain for the memories I enjoy and the times I thank Tonia for lessons she has taught me that I apply in my life. There are times I just want the windows to heaven opened for a brief conversation, a tidbit of advice or even a chance to give her a hug and make sure she knows she is not forgotten. Then I pray and ask our Father in Heaven to please have someone do it for me since he won’t let me do it myself.

I am ever so grateful for our Fathers plan of salvation and the eternal family aspects of it. I know there are some who think this may just be a story to help us when we lose a dear loved one and I know that is because these people have not been able to receive or understand the testimony born by the Holy Ghost about Gods plan. I testify here and now that I have received such a testimony and do now thru that Holy Spirit that Heaven does exist and our Loved ones can be a part of our eternity if we follow the plan of salvation and do our best to live as Christ has taught us. I know this and I know Tonia knew it. She gave her all trying to live as best she could and is a great example for us to follow. While I do not get to have those one on one conversation I sometimes desire, I do get the blessing of having memories brought to mind which help me know what advice she would give me if I could talk to her. I pray often that these influences can be felt by our children as well.

This year our dear friend Ivan Miller returned to the same Heavenly home mentioned above. I am
positive his Ruth and many others were so happy to see him and Tonia would have been there to. It
makes me wonder if the pets like Trigger also get to be a part of such reunions. But I know that Tonia
would have been there to thank him again for all he and his family have done to bless our family over
the years. We have their influences surrounding us all the time and we are so grateful for it.
We are blessed to have 3 very healthy grandchildren who all walk now. We do not get to see Skylar in person much with Payton being stationed in Fort Lewis, Washington but thankfully there is Skype and videos. Max and Terikk play together often and it is fun to watch their development. Brook and Ross have a new home and Ross has improved his job again. Austin has a new Job in SLC after spending a few months as a traveling sales team member getting to see a bit of New Mexico last fall. RileyJohn is back in the Ogden area and is trying to start a new business with an associate from his last job. We wish him the best in this adventure. As I said Payton and Britney are in Washington at Fort Lewis and all are in good health. Busy of course with that first year of a new baby. Sage is living in Logan and working with her artistic skills helping develop body art. Brady has received his mission call to Santa Rosa California to report on June 25th!!! He has been working for ICON as work load permits. Dax is a junior and is now in a social dance class. I’m sure it’s not his favorite as it was Kristi and my choice but hopefully he will thank us later. Kayonia is also a junior and is enjoying her school as usual and trying out for the local Special Olympics group. Chance is almost 15(next month) and almost as tall as I am. Very soon he will pass me up in height. He is enjoying Guitar 2 and looking forward to his drivers permit this year.

Kristi and I are always grateful for the blessings of our family and hard as it can be to keep up with the role as parents we are eternally grateful for the help of our savior Jesus Christ and his messenger the Holy Spirit. For Kristi it is a bit harder as Tonia had not quite finished with my training when she wore out and got to go home. So Kristi has to try and finish my upbringing as well as nine youth and now grandchildren. But it is great to be young grandparents. I love playing with these gifts from God. Kristi excels at this part as well. It is fun to watch as our grandchildren light up when she gets silly with them. We had a young woman in our ward say to a group that “sometimes she just needs to hold that baby” referring to her little sister.
Kristi and I can relate as sometimes on rough days just getting to hold one of the precious little ones can change our thoughts from dark to light. I can see it in each of our children when they get to play with their nieces and nephews or their own children which ever it happens to be. Once again God knows how to show us again the beauty of his creations even when the efforts of raising our children or coming to adulthood for those children becomes hard at times he introduces more little ones to remind us of his miracles in life. Thank you Father for these blessings and for thy care of our loved ones who have gone home before us for a rest.

Tonia I love you as does your family. Ryan(Elf)

1 comment:

Kristi T. said...

I just wanted to add that I love the angel lit up in Tonia's tree lights. I know it was not intentionally designed but kinda a reminder everyone who loved Tonia during her earthly life now has that sweet angel watching after them. I love you Tonia and I think of you often as does my family. One sweet story to represent this was earlier this year my daughters goat bloated and passed away before we knew what to do for her. It was a really sad moment because Cocoa Jane was the sweetest goat ever. She would follow us around the ranch as we were doing chores. She was the first animal to give birth at Crazy Creek Ranch which was a fun memory for all of us. Just a really sweet and special spirit about her. So as you can imagine it was a tragic moment one I was especially dealing with feeling like the bloat was my fault. I was crying and feeling super bad for what I felt I had caused my daughter so much heart break. When she came and gave me the biggest hug ever and said "Mom it is ok, I know we loved Cocoa Jane a lot, but you know how much Aunt Tonia loved animals like me? Well, I think Cocoa Jane just needed to be with her to help her be as happy as Cocoa Jane made us. She is happy at Aunt Tonia's farm in heaven." (or it was something really close to that) So yes Tonia lives on in our lives she is always there to receive all the animals that we lose at the ranch bless her heart. Thank you Tonia for being such a great source of comfort to all of us! Kristi, Terry, Bowdee, Matia and Treg and yes all of our Crazy Creek Animals!